MEDIATION DISPUTE RESOLUTION AND DIVORCE-INHERITANCE MEDIATION

The mediators
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Two highly experienced mediators are associated with SPEE advocaten & mediation. We would like to introduce ourselves to you on this page.

Monique Spee

Since 2012, I have had the privilege to not only be a lawyer, but also an officially registered mediator at, and a member of, the Dutch mediation federation Mediatorsfederatie Nederland (MfN). In my experience, both individuals and companies often have most to gain from proper dialogue, and from resolving conflicts or avoiding them in the first place. In my role as a mediator, I get people embroiled in a business or personal conflict talking again, and probe their underlying interests and motives. This breaks the stalemate and (more often than not) leads to greater mutual understanding - paving the way, in many cases, for a solution.
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If the problem turns out to be more deep-seated, I involve horses in the mediation process, as they possess a pure and infinite wisdom and an innate feel for the underlying dynamic.
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My style as a mediator can be described as directive, to the point, and solution-focused. I like to make the parties involved feel safe and equal, to reopen the lines of communication and enable the parties, under my guidance, to move towards solutions.

When to choose mediation in business disputes? (Monique Spee)
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I would be happy to help if you are faced with an ongoing or imminent labour conflict, a dispute about an employee's fitness or incapacity for work, or if the company doctor has prescribed mediation. You can also come to me if you have a dispute with your shareholder(s), fellow executives, director(s), or partner in a general partnership, or if arguments have arisen over the sale of a horse. These are just a few examples of the type of mediation I conduct. Please feel free to contact me if your problem is not listed, as it is highly likely that I can help.
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National and international / cross-border mediation
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I also have a lot of experience of mediations with an international dimension, such as labour conflicts at multinationals, or Dutch companies that employ workers of differing nationalities. I can easily conduct mediation sessions in German or English.
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How does business mediation work?
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Is there a problem with a person or an organisation that the parties cannot resolve together? Then mediation can be chosen. This is usually a far less drastic step than taking someone to court. Mediation can also save time and money, as a mediation process is much quicker and therefore less costly. During mediation, the parties must work towards a solution based on their underlying, common interests. The mediator provides expert support. In many cases, mediation culminates in a solution.
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Mediators specialize in facilitating negotiations, focusing on common interests rather than individual views. A mediator has been trained to use particular techniques to highlight those interests, along with any underlying obstacles. Mediators are impartial and independent; their role is to help find a solution. Both parties must trust and have confidence in the mediator.
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Voluntary participation and confidentiality
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Taking part in mediation is optional, but not without obligations: the parties must be willing to work together towards a solution. Everyone who attends mediation must treat the content of the mediation and of any negotiations with the utmost confidentiality. This ensures an atmosphere of security and trust, which is essential to breaking deadlock in the dispute and getting communication going.
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Mediation participants about Monique Spee
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This is how mediation participants experience me as a mediator/ mediations guided by me:
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"Monique's professional attitude makes you feel good and confident.
Despite the fact that the mediation process has not (yet) led to the desired result, Monique Spee gives you a good and safe feeling, also because of her professional attitude. It was certainly not her fault that the mediation did not (yet) lead to a solution."
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Unfortunately, a mediation process was necessary but fortunately this was with SPEE advocaten & mediation!
Despite my reservations at the start of the mediation process, I am very satisfied with the service provided. The impasse between my employer and me was resolved in a respectful and pleasant manner.
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“Extremely helpful!
The mediator helped me tremendously, in my role as a manager, with a case I could not solve myself. I experienced the process as professional and, above all, very personal. Warmth and commitment without losing sight of working towards a good solution. The combination of good information, opportunity to talk, objectivity and commitment towards both parties was very pleasant and supportive.“
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The mediator gave confidence in a good outcome. The mediator also had sufficient empathy and was clear in communication. She correctly led the mediation meetings between parties and guarded against escalation. The mediator's solution orientation was high.
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Pleasant, competent and understanding.
With a situation that was difficult to explain, I still felt understood. The situation (labour dispute) was resolved well.
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Monique is very patient and clear with her communication. Professional!
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Smooth and clear communication. The mediation process was quickly set up and worked out. A solution was reached to everyone's satisfaction.
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Pleasant, professional, warm.
I have experienced the mediation with Monique Spee as very pleasant. She radiates confidence and warmth, while she approaches the discussions energetically and is not afraid to ask the right questions.
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Very professional, expert, careful with human dimensions and empathy, mediator Monique Spee knows how to find a balance between the interests of those involved and how to work constructively towards a solution.
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“I would like to thank the mediator once again for the good support, from the first moment it felt right. This was the first time I went into mediation and hopefully the only time, although I never had a bad feeling before, during or after the mediation sessions. I am truly grateful that I chose Monique Spee. The picture on the website and the story underneath immediately gave me a good feeling, she radiates calm and confidence. During the mediation she is decisive, to the point, but all this from love; this is how I felt and experienced it. Without the mediation and her guidance, I would never have had the chance to reintegrate according to the rules of the law. It hasn't all gone well, but at the same time I have learned beautiful life lessons from it. I had lost confidence in myself for a while and that confidence came back during the mediation and that is partly due to what Monique radiates and conveys. She is a beautiful and sweet person, with her heart in the right place, sincere, honest, with a portion of curiosity that is important to reach solutions and with attention to the emotions of both parties, without judging them. A completely unique, and I suspect special, way of mediation. There is always respect for both parties and what I like best is that she masters the art of turning negative into positive. The fact that she discusses what someone experiences as negative, but does not refer to it as such later on: as far as I am concerned, that is her strength. I hope that one day I may meet her under different circumstances, she is a source of inspiration. I suspect that this is not the "standard" way of working for a mediator and I am therefore extremely grateful that I ended up at SPEE advocaten & mediation when I was looking for a mediator.”
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Professional, clear and determined to reach agreement.
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Compliments for the good mediation meetings.
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“Professional and friendly approach.
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Professional, expert and with an eye for the interests of both parties.
Monique Spee has guided the advised mediationprocess in a very professional manner. Constantly focused on an optimal final outcome for both parties and with equality of all involved, as a basis.
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First rate! All I can say is, this mediation was conducted flawlessly by Monique Spee. Everything was clear, and she was so professional. She got straight to the crux of the matter. Thanks so much, Monique!
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Mediation with consideration for both parties, to the point. Impartial, independent, incisive, exerting just the right amount of pressure, empathic.
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When to choose mediation in divorce or inheritance issues? (Angelique van den Eshoff)
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Mediation is a good choice for divorce disputes as well as inheritance disputes because it is a process in which an independent third party, the mediator, helps to guide the parties involved in reaching a resolution to their dispute.
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In divorce or inheritance disputes, emotions can run high and there may be deep disagreements between the parties involved. In these cases, mediation can help improve communication between the parties and establish a constructive dialogue. The mediator can help the parties understand their interests and concerns and guide them in finding solutions acceptable to all parties.
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Compared to court proceedings, mediation offers several advantages. It is quicker, cheaper and less formal than court proceedings. Moreover, the parties have more control over the outcome of the dispute. Instead of a decision imposed by a judge, the parties themselves can decide what is the best solution for their situation.
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Divorce mediation, also for business owners and in case of complex divisions and distributions
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I specialise - also as a mediator - in more complex divorce mediations. This includes, for example, cases where there is a high level of conflict between the ex-partners, often also involving minor children, or when there are major interests at stake, such as in the case of business owners, large assets or complicated prenuptial agreements.
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Business owners in particular often have a lot to lose in a divorce. In addition to all the emotional impact, a divorce can also have serious consequences for their businesses. As a family law mediator, I understand the complexity of business structures and can help entrepreneurs and their partners protect the business interest. I can work with the entrepreneurial couple to ensure that fair and realistic agreements are reached when dividing the business, while not jeopardising the continuity of the business but also not losing sight of personal interests. With my bulk of experience, I understand the specific challenges faced by entrepreneurial couples in a divorce situation and can help them make the right decisions.
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Mediation can also help preserve or improve the relationship between the parties, especially in those cases where parties will have to deal with each other in the future, such as parents of minor children or heirs in a family business.

Inheritance mediation

The loss of a loved one is an emotional and challenging time in our lives. Unfortunately, however, in addition to all the grief, complicated (legal) issues can arise in relation to estates. Inheritance conflicts can drive family members apart and damage precious relationships. Fortunately, there is an alternative approach that can help resolve such (latent) disputes: inheritance or estate mediation.

What is inheritance mediation?

Inheritance mediation is a process in which a neutral third party, the inheritance mediator, helps involved family members to resolve (latent) disputes relating to an estate. The mediator is specially trained in conflict mediation and seeks to promote open dialogue and constructive negotiation. The aim of inheritance mediation is to reach a joint solution acceptable to all parties involved, without the need for litigation.

Specialised inheritance mediator

In estate mediation, it is very important to involve a lawyer-mediator who specialises in inheritance law/ estate mediation. A mediator with this specific expertise has a deep understanding and knowledge of the complex legal aspects involved in (the settlement of) an estate. This has several advantages:
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1. Legal knowledge and guidance: a lawyer-mediator with a background in inheritance law provides valuable legal knowledge and guidance during the mediation process. The specialised lawyer-mediator can inform the parties involved about the relevant laws, rules and rights applicable to the estate. This ensures a better understanding of the legal context and contributes to finding realistic and viable solutions.
2. Efficiency and cost savings: the combination of mediation and inheritance law expertise can lead to a more efficient handling of the dispute. The lawyer-mediator can help the parties involved address the legal issues in a structured manner and have focused discussions. This helps avoid unnecessary delays and legal costs associated with court proceedings.
3. Creative solutions: a lawyer-mediator with inheritance law expertise can propose innovative and creative solutions that take into account both the legal and personal interests of the parties involved. Alternative options can be explored, such as setting up a family fund, creating specific conditions for certain assets or creating a detailed care plan for vulnerable family members. These tailor-made solutions can help distribute the estate in a balanced and equitable manner.
4. Neutrality and balance: a lawyer-mediator who also specialises in inheritance law can act as a neutral and balanced intermediary between the parties involved. They understand the emotional charge that often accompanies inheritance disputes and can facilitate communication between the parties. Through their impartial role, they can ensure that all points of view are heard and that a fair and equitable process takes place.

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Inheritance mediation has proven to be a valuable tool in resolving estate disputes. Instead of going through a long and costly legal battle, mediation offers the opportunity to reach a lasting agreement that does justice to the needs and wishes of all involved. Experience shows that estate mediation can lead to a harmonious solution and also the preservation of valuable family ties, despite intense emotions and complex legal issues.

Engaging a lawyer-mediator specialised in inheritance law/legacy mediation also offers clear advantages. It helps optimise the mediation process and contributes to finding lasting solutions that are both legally and emotionally satisfactory (and sustainable) for all involved. If you are involved in an estate dispute, or suspect such a dispute is about to arise, engage a mediator with inheritance law expertise to guide you in finding a solution that does justice to your needs. An experienced estate mediator can help you to find a joint solution and to avoid lengthy court proceedings. If you have any questions or need the support of an experienced inheritance mediator, please feel free to contact Mrs Angelique van den Eshoff, specialised family and inheritance lawyer and mediator at SPEE lawyers & mediation.

In short, mediation offers an effective and often inexpensive way to resolve family law or inheritance disputes, with the parties themselves in control of the process and outcome of the dispute.

Our Mediators are affiliated to MfN/vFAS
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For more information on (business) mediation, quality assurance and regulations, please visit the website of the Mediatorsfederatie Nederland (MfN). For more information, visit www.mfnregister.nl/.

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Every MfN-registered mediator, including Monique Spee, performs his or her work according to the rules of the MfN.
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Family law and inheritance law mediator Angelique van den Eshoff is a member of the specialist association the family law and inheritance law lawyers and mediators vFAS. For more information: www.verder-online.nl. www.verder-online.nl.

Mediation with horses

The role of horses in mediation
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With my passion for horses, combined with my faith in mediation as a means of resolving conflicts, I (Monique Spee) sometimes use horses in my mediation processes, working with an experienced and certified horse trainer. Horses mirror the conscious and unconscious signals we give off and do not react to rational thought processes. When they observe the horse, and feel its energy, the mediation parties gain an insight into the situation which may already have occurred to them on a subconscious level. This creates space and freedom to look at the situation differently, and deal with it differently. It also clears the way for a solution to the conflict.
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To reiterate, mediation is not just about the parties’ underlying interests, but also about the underlying obstacles (feelings or beliefs, annoyances, old wounds) which, on the face of it, make a conflict seem insurmountable to the parties, and lead them to consider going to court.
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Horses mirror the conscious and unconscious signals we give off and do not react to rational thought processes. If, for instance, during mediation between an employer and employee in a labour dispute, one party 'thinks’ that he or she would like a supervisory role but, deep down, feels uneasy about taking on this role, the horse will respond to the unease, or fear, by displaying fear or agitation. This is interpreted by the horse trainer/mediator to give the parties an insight into the cause of the situation, and bring to light the origin of the feeling of unease. The parties can then take concrete steps in the direction they are pursuing and that feels right to them, armed with an understanding of, and an insight into each other’s underlying interests, feelings, and obstacles or blocks that had previously prevented the parties from finding a solution.
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During this horse mediation session, the horse also shows us where and/or around whom the greatest amount of 'energy’ is concentrated, without passing any positive or negative judgement. The horse trainer/mediator facilitates the whole process, without too much dialogue. When they observe the horse, and feel its energy, the mediation parties gain an insight into the situation which may already have occurred to them on a subconscious level. This creates space and freedom to look at and deal with the situation differently, clearing the way for a solution to the conflict.
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Mediation with the help of horses is a highly effective way of getting to the root of a problem, as horses reveal the situation and the attitudes of the parties in an impartial way. This often serves as confirmation to the people involved of what they ‘knew’ all along. Whilst most people find this an uncomfortable experience, it is also extremely effective.